To My Dear Dad In Heaven

Dear Dad, I thought of you yesterday, In fact this Is nothing new because I thought of you yesterdays and days before that too. I thought of you In silence and sometimes I speak your name. I have nothing but memories. Memories that keep me always feel your presence with the feeling that nothing can put you out of my mind and my heart.

They said that death change everything but time change nothing. They also said that time will heal our sufferings; but none of this happened, I still miss you as much as I used to when you first gone, I still miss your voice, the way you used to talk to me, I still miss you coming home and calling my name, I still look at your pictures and sometimes listen to that song you used to love.

Your death was so quick that I couldn’t figure out how fast was It. I will never forget that day, It was wednesday, everything was as normal as usual. But sadly nothing stay as It Is, My world changed with one uncomprehensible phone call from mum. You wouldn’t imagine how fast I went home, last thing I said to you the day before was “I will see you in the weekend dad ” of course I didn’t, stupid selfish me, I couldn’t see you before you’re gone. I’m really sorry for not being there with you In your last days, I’m sorry you needed me and I wasn’t there, trying to save my stupid job. I’m sorry you suffered a lot and you hide It from me, you didn’t tell me how sick you were and that you barely breath.

I really regret all that, I came at the last moment, but It was too late, you were so cold , your face was so pale, I thought you were just tired and you need to rest a bit. I didn’t imagine that It was your last day on earth, your last journey and that you needed a rest forever. When those doctors came, I couldn’t believe them, all I thought Is that they are possibly wrong, May be they’re talking about someone else not my dad. But as I came Into your room and give you that last kiss I realize that your gone.

I couldn’t do nothing at this moment, my heart, my brain and my whole body was shocked, I couldn’t bear that you’re gone and we will never see you. But now and after 2 years of your death I know that you’re in a much better place than we are, I know that It was Allah’s willingness and that He chose you to be there and rest. yeah; your life wasn’t that easy, you suffered a lot so that you could provide us all our needs, you went through so many difficult times that I still remember and It was time for you ;dear dad to take a deep rest and go Into your eternal life .

What I would like to say as I’m writing this, Is thank you for everything you did for us, thank you for your love. thank you for the memories, thank you for being a good hardworking man who helped me a lot and encouraged me to be the person I’m today .

I just want you to know that I love you so much, I sometimes didn’t show you that, at times I did some stupid things that might hurt you or annoy you, I’m pretty sure I had messed up so many times but, I’m really sorry, I couldn’t tell you that when you’re still alive but I know you can hear me up In heaven, I know you feel me and you feel all my prayers for you. That’s why I’m writing this just so that you know that you will always be alive In my heart and In my mind. I will never forget you and I will always hope that we will be gathered INCHAALAH In heaven .